We Need You
by camwrites15
Summary: "She was right. He did need help. But nobody here could help him. There was only one person who could do that. And he was gone forever." Rated M just to be safe. Riker's depressed, and his family doesn't know how to save him.
1. Chapter 1- Present

**This is more of the prologue than anything. Tell me what you think! This is my first story, so I'm sorry if it sucks.**

PRESENT:

"Ross, I'm sorry, okay? Please…" Maia sobbed on the other line.

Ross felt numb. He was surprised he even had a grip on his phone. "Who was it?" he asked dryly. "Garrett?"

Her silence answered his question. "I knew it," he picked at his comforter, biting his lip to keep from crying.

"Baby, please. I love you, you know that," Maia pleaded.

Ross shook his head in disbelief. "I don't," he replied honestly.

"Ross…"

He cut her off. "I can't do this right now."

Despite her begging him to stay, he hit end. Then, glaring angrily at his phone, he chucked it across the room, getting a small amount of satisfaction from the crunching sound it made when it made contact with the wall.

He needed more.

His glance traveled to his guitar, which had been virtually untouched in almost a year. He had the urge to grab it, to smash it against the wall, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Not yet, anyway.

Ross hadn't lost it like this in a while. He hadn't needed to break anything, to hit anyone, or even to hurt himself in over a year. He had been doing well.

But all it took was Maia's betrayal, her lies, her disloyalty, to throw him back off the edge. He scrambled off the bed, catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror.

As usual, he hated what he saw. He looked too much like _him._ Everybody said so, and he was getting sick of hearing it.

"Leave me alone!" he screamed, pounding his fist against the mirror, cracking it and causing shards to come off, some sticking to his hand.

Breathing heavily, he stared at the blood streaking down his fist, flowing faster now, since he clenched the shards in his hand.

_More_, he thought. _I need more._

He pulled one from his hand, and positioned it right above his opposite wrist. His eyes followed the scars that ran down his arm, and he planned to reopen those wounds.

Until the door opened.

"Ross?"

He didn't need to look up. Immediately, Rydel had grabbed both of his hands, and taken the glass away from him.

"Ross, what are you doing? I thought… I thought this was over," Rydel whimpered, starting to cry.

He couldn't handle it. "Get out, Rydel."

She glared at him in disbelief.

"I'm serious!" he told her, now shouting. "Get. OUT."

His sister's expression hardened. "You need to stop this. We all lost him, you know. It's hard on all of us. But do you really think this is going to help?" She gestured to the broken mirror and his bloody hand.

He refused to look at her. He pressed his palm into the mirror, and he actually felt some pain shoot through his arm.

But her next words stung deeper than anything. "If he saw you, he'd be ashamed. You weren't supposed to turn out like him."

Ross whirled around to glare at her, but she had left. He considered chasing after her, screaming at her, hurting her, but he collapsed on the floor instead, finally breaking down into sobs.

She was right. He did need help.

But nobody here could help him. There was only one person who could do that.

And he was gone forever.


	2. Chapter 2

TWO YEARS AGO:

Ross strummed a few chords on his guitar, then slammed it on the couch, frustrated. "Shit," he muttered angrily.

Just then, his older brother Riker walked in, whistling some obscure tune. He stopped abruptly when he saw Ross's expression.

"Whoa," he commented, sitting next to his younger brother. "What's up with you?"

"This fucking tune," Ross groaned. "I can't get it." He grabbed the sheet music and lyrics that Rocky, his second oldest brother, had dropped off for him.

"These lyrics suck," he snapped. "What the hell was Rocky thinking?"

Riker let out a low whistle. "Dude, you need to calm down." He took the sheets from Ross, reading them himself. "It's not the lyrics. Those are really good." He flipped through the sheet music as well. "This is good, too."

Ross rolled his eyes, irritated. "Then why the hell can't I play it?"

Riker shrugged. "Play it. Let's see."

Ross glared at his brother, but as usual, Riker matched his glare, causing Ross to back down. Sighing, he picked his guitar back up, and attempted to play the song again. And again, he stumbled through a few notes.

"See?" he groaned, flopping back on the couch. "It's awkward. I hate it."

Riker frowned, and thought for a minute. "You're forcing it," he finally said.

"What?"

"Try loosening up. Don't think too much. Just play like you know how," Riker instructed.

Ross paused, realizing he was probably right. He usually was.

Riker smirked. "Just try it. I'm looking forward to hearing it later at practice."

He got up to leave, and as he got halfway down the hall, he heard smoother, more natural guitar chords from behind him, along with a soft voice.

"Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep."

Riker grinned, and kept walking.

_A WEEK LATER, AT THE CONCERT_

"Take that money, watch it burn. Sink in the river, the lessons I learned."

Ross finished the song, chest heaving.

_This song is fire,_ he thought as he watched the crowd go crazy.

He was sorry he had ever doubted Rocky, and he was grateful to Riker for making him see it.

"Thank you, everybody!" Riker yelled into his microphone. He looked over at Ross, smiling brightly, and raising his eyebrows as if to say, _Told you so._ He then joined Ross in the middle of the stage, along with Rocky, Rydel, and Ratliff. They took their final bow, and left the stage as the lights dimmed.

"That was amazing!" Ratliff shouted as they got backstage, picking Rydel up and spinning her around in his excitement. Rocky snickered, and the two blushed furiously as Ratliff set her back down.

Ross nodded in agreement. "Shout out to Rocky for making the best song ever!" He clapped his brother on the shoulder.

Riker put his arms around both of them. "And shout out to Riker for making you believe it." He smirked at Ross, and Rocky's expression changed to mock-hurt.

"What? You mean Ross didn't like my, well, not to brag, but my song that might as well have been written by Jesus himself?" He wiped away an imaginary tear.

"Yeah, yeah. I was wrong, okay?" Ross admitted, holding up his hands in defeat. His brothers laughed, but Rocky suddenly stopped to look at Riker.

"Bro, are you okay? You look a lot thinner."

Riker laughed, but Rocky picked up the nervous tone. "Calling me fat, Rocky?"

Rocky frowned. "Dude, I'm serious. You've been eating, right?"

Riker's smile faded, and he rolled his eyes. "Yes, Mom. And I've been brushing my teeth twice a day, getting at least eight hours of sleep, and showering at least once every day. Anything else?"

Rocky was going to continue, but seeing the look on Riker's face made him drop it.

"I'm going to get ready for the meet-and-greet," Riker said. "You guys should probably do the same." And with that, he turned and disappeared into the dressing room.

Ross shook his head at Rocky. "You're being dumb. Nothing's wrong with him." He followed Riker.

Rydel nudged Rocky. "What do you think is wrong with him?" she asked worriedly.

Rocky couldn't ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach. "I don't know," he admitted. "But it's not good."

_Stupid, _Riker thought as he closed the dressing room door behind him. _You're an idiot. You knew Rocky would notice._

He stared at himself in the mirror. He had gotten a lot thinner. Lifting his shirt, he realized that his ribs were starting to show. With a sinking feeling, he decided that if he didn't want his siblings to worry about him, he would have to start eating again. And sleeping, he added, as he noticed the dark circles around his eyes.

He would just have to find the motivation again.

For them, at least.

Just then, the door flew open. Riker yanked his shirt back down as Ross entered.

"Rocky's an idiot," he said, rolling his eyes. He scanned his older brother, shaking his head. "So what if you've lost a little weight? I'm jealous, man." He lifted his own shirt, revealing his tanned abs. "Actually, never mind."

Riker snickered, but felt a pang of sadness. He knew Ross idolized him, and would think of any other excuse before accusing Riker of any wrongdoing.

"Ross?" he started. This was it. He was going to tell his younger brother the truth. Maybe he would stop looking up to him. Maybe he had a chance of not being screwed up.

Ross turned away from his reflection to face his brother. "Yeah?"

Riker sighed. "I-" Say it. Say. It. But he looked at his baby brother, wide-eyed and innocent. And Riker knew that telling him would be a huge mistake. It would crush him.

He would just have to stick it out. Maybe try to get better.

For Ross. He had to.

Ross stared at him expectantly. "You…?"

Riker forced a smile. "_We_ should go get everybody for the meet-and-greet." He stood up, and left to get the rest of the band, leaving a bewildered Ross in the dressing room.

Frowning, Ross knew there was something else. He just couldn't figure out what.

Why _had _Riker been losing weight? He had already been pretty skinny, so Ross couldn't see him having a body image problem.

So what was it? He could only think of one thing, but he got rid of that idea the second it popped in his head.

Riker was _not _depressed.

Right?


	3. Chapter 3

Rocky couldn't sleep that night. He kept tossing and turning, occasionally getting up to check on Riker. Every time he checked, his brother was sound asleep.

Which was good, right?

He had noticed something was off with Riker for a while now. He had just figured his brother was just moody, and written it off as a bad week. But the weight loss, it was _serious._

Now that he thought about it, he hadn't actually seen Riker eat in weeks. The most he had seen was a couple bites out of an apple, or maybe a granola bar.

Rolling over, Rocky grabbed his phone and Googled, "symptoms of depression."

The first link brought up a list, followed by treatment plans and other information. Rocky scanned the list.

-Difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions.

Riker had been somewhat spacey, and he seemed content with handing most of the responsibility to Rydel lately.

-Fatigue and decreased energy.

The dark circles and bags under his eyes confirmed that Riker was tired, like, all the time.

-Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, and/or helplessness.

Rocky had no way of knowing what was going on inside Riker's head. He glanced over at his brother's sleeping figure, and whispered, "Do you feel like this?"

-Insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping.

Due to his decreased energy, Rocky concluded that Riker hadn't been sleeping a lot lately. And he _was _always the first one up.

-Irritability, restlessness

He was good at hiding it, but Riker had seemed a little more testy lately.

-Loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex

Riker hadn't seemed to lose interest in playing music. Even just that night at the concert, he had seemed fine. And sex? Did Riker even have sex? Rocky shuddered, not even wanting to think about that.

-Overeating or appetite loss

Definitely the latter. He was way too thin.

-Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment

Rocky thought back to the last few band practices. Riker had excused himself early each time, complaining to have a headache.

-Persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" feelings

Again, Rocky didn't know. But he was having trouble believing it. Riker was usually really happy. Or at least, he acted like it.

-Thoughts of suicide or suicide attempts

Rocky's heart dropped as he read the last symptom. Suicide? Would Riker even think about that? He couldn't imagine waking up one day, and seeing his big brother's lifeless body laying in the bed next to him. How would he do it? Cutting and bleeding out? No way. Riker hated blood. Hanging himself? Overdosing? He felt sick as he thought of it. He was almost certain Riker would overdose. It was quick, painless, and nobody would notice until it was over.

Panicking, Rocky ran over to Riker's bed, and checked for a pulse. He was relieved when he found one, but he made a promise to himself that he would watch Riker all night, just to be sure.

_Don't kill yourself, Riker, _he pleaded internally.

1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111

The next morning, Riker woke up to find Rocky staring at him. From the looks of it, he hadn't gotten much sleep either. Meaning he had probably been watching him all night.

"Jesus Christ, Rocky!" he exclaimed. "You almost gave me a heart attack. What the hell are you doing, anyway?"

Rocky looked away. "I guess… I was just making sure you woke up." He glanced at Riker nervously.

Riker froze. Rocky knew. "What… what do you-"

"Don't try to bullshit me," Rocky interrupted. "I know what's wrong with you."

Riker shook his head. "No. You don't."

His brother narrowed his eyes. "Yeah, I do. You're depr-"

"Shut up," Riker snapped. He wasn't ready for anybody to know, let alone say it out loud.

Rocky sighed. "Why, Riker?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you… you know…" he didn't want to say it. He barely wanted to believe it. But the signs had been pointing to it for a while now.

Riker looked at him sadly. "I don't know. All I know is I haven't had the motivation to do anything in a while. To eat, even sleep, really. I don't know how I actually got to sleep last night, to be honest."

Rocky stared at his brother in shock. Sure, he had known. But somehow, hearing Riker say it out loud, and describe what was happening made it worse. "You just… you have so much to-"

"Live for?" Riker let out a bitter laugh. "I'm not going to kill myself, Rocky. There's no way I could do that to you guys."

"But if it weren't for us…" Rocky let the sentence go unfinished. He saw his brother pause, then nod slowly.

"I wouldn't have anything else to live for."

Suddenly, Rocky was finding it hard to breathe. Tears blurred his vision, and he couldn't look at Riker anymore.

"Please don't tell," Riker said quietly. "It'll kill them. Ross especially."

Rocky didn't feel right about it, but he nodded. "I won't," he whispered. Wiping his eyes, he turned back to his brother. "But you have to promise me you'll try to get better. There's like, medicines for that," he suggested.

Riker shook his head. "No. Those don't work. At least, not on their own."

"You have to try," Rocky insisted.

"I know, Rocky," he said, feeling irritation build up.

"Then why aren't you doing it?" Rocky pushed.

"You don't get it!" Riker burst out. "It's not just that easy. I can't just flip a switch and automatically be okay. It doesn't work like that. I have a problem, Rocky. A psychological problem."

Clenching his jaw, Rocky stood up. "Then deal with it. Go to a therapist or something. We need you, Riker."

He left the room, leaving Riker alone with his thoughts.

_He's right. _

"About what?"

_You're crazy._

"Oh. Probably. I mean, I am talking to myself."

_But he's also lying to you._

"Rocky doesn't lie."

_They don't need you._

"Shut up. Yes they do."

_You might as well just do it. _

"I promised Rocky I wouldn't. I said I'd try."

_Then you're a liar, too. _

"I'm not. I will try."

_You're going to fail. You're pathetic._

"I know."

_Do it, then._

"No."

_Do. It._

"No!"

_DO IT!_

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Riker collapsed on his bed, disappearing into a puddle of sobs.

Meanwhile, Rocky slumped against the closed door, crying softly into his hands as he listened to his older brother lose it on the other side of the door.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I just wanted to say thank you to my first reviewers! I don't think you know how much that meant to me**** Also, thank you to anybody that favorited/followed, or who is even reading this. This is my first published work, and I really appreciate any kind of support! I haven't updated this in kind of a while, so here's the latest chapter! (Sorry if they're short, I promise as I get deeper into the story they will be longer.)**

Rydel had just finished making breakfast, and she went to call the boys to eat.

Humming softly, she reminisced on the previous night.

It had been incredible.

They had all been on fire. It was honestly one of their best concerts to date.

She was happy for other reasons as well, however. Rydel blushed when she thought about the way her and Ratliff had interacted on stage. They had been fun and flirty. But that was nothing new.

When they did the Seven Nation Army cover, it had gotten steamy. Like, really steamy.

Like, she was getting turned on just thinking about it, steamy.

And then there was after. It was after the concert and the meet-and-greet. She had just been packing up in her dressing room, when there was a knock on her door.

"Rydel?"

It was Ratliff.

She had opened the door eagerly, and there he was. God, how had she not noticed how attracted to him she was? She had always felt it, but never acted on it.

He seemed nervous. He couldn't even finish a sentence.

"Rydel, I-"

"Do you-"

"Maybe- shit."

Until finally, he just murmured a "Fuck it," and kissed her. .

And there it was. Her first kiss. Her first kiss, and it was with Ratliff. Her best friend, her soul mate, her rock.

It was perfect.

Frowning, she remembered how he had handled afterwards. He had blushed, apologized, and ran off. Ever since, he had been avoiding her. She didn't know why, but honestly, she figured he had a good reason.

She was not going to let it ruin her mood, that was for sure.

Rydel made a mental note to ask Riker if Ratliff had said anything.

But when she got to Riker and Rocky's room, all thoughts about Ratliff were pushed from her mind when she saw Rocky huddled against the door, his face in his hands.

"Rocky!" she rushed over, putting an arm around him.

He looked up, startled. "Shit, I'm sorry," he said quietly, wiping his face with the back of his hand.

"What's wrong?" she asked, shocked and confused. Rocky never broke down like this.

"Shh," he whispered. "Seriously, be quiet. Let's go somewhere else."

She tried to protest, but he had already pulled her to her feet and was leading her down the hall. He stopped when they got to the living room, too far for Riker to hear them from his room.

"Rocky, what's going on? You're freaking me out."

Rocky paced back and forth. "Look, I don't know if I should tell you."

"Tell me what?" Rydel asked, worriedly.

"He told me not to tell…" he trailed off, talking more to himself than anybody.

"Who did? Is it Riker?" she remembered the confrontation from last night. "Rocky, seriously. Tell me," she demanded.

Rocky stopped pacing, and closed his eyes. "Riker's depressed."

Rydel frowned. "About what?"

He shook his head. "No, like clinically depressed. Like suicide-watch depressed."

She gasped. "What?" She turned back to the hall, ready to rush into her older brother's room. But Rocky grabbed her arm and held her back.

"No, Rydel. Please. He told me not to tell," Rocky pleaded, his eyes welling up with tears again. Rydel stared at him, more in shock than anything, before breaking down as well. Rocky pulled her into his arms, comforting his older sister, even though he needed comforting too.

"He said he'd get better," Rocky said, his voice breaking off. "But I don't know."

"We're going to help him," Rydel sobbed. "We have to."

"Help who?"

Rocky and Rydel whirled around, to see Ross standing in the living room, looking extremely confused. And behind him was Riker.

Rydel studied him, and besides the slight weight loss and dark circles under his eyes, she had to admit there wasn't much of a difference in her brother's appearance. He didn't carry himself differently, he didn't act much differently, and he didn't treat any of them differently.

Even now, he watched them worriedly. But he didn't seem worried that they knew about him. He seemed worried, like he genuinely didn't know what was wrong with them.

Rydel felt herself doubt Rocky's claims.

But when Rocky made eye contact with Riker, she saw his head shake, although it was barely noticeable. And that confirmed it for her.

Ross, however, had no idea what was going on.

"Help who…?" he repeated slowly, frowning at his older siblings.

Rydel panicked, and looked to Rocky for help. But he seemed just as caught off guard as she did, and he stared back at her helplessly.

She wanted to say something. Run to her older brother, hug him, tell him it would be okay. Tell him he would get better. Tell him they would help him.

But something about the way Riker was glaring at Rocky made her stay quiet.

Ross cleared his throat loudly, still waiting for an answer. Rydel opened her mouth, ready to spew some bullshit answer that probably wouldn't make sense.

"Ryland," Riker cut in. "He's… um, well he's failing some classes, and he might not be able to graduate."

It was a lame excuse, and Rydel knew Ross didn't buy it. He frowned at Riker, confused, but then shrugged, dropping the subject.

"Rocky, I need your help with something," he started excitedly. "I think I have a song coming on, but I can't figure out the chorus."

Before Rocky could protest, Ross had dragged him down the hall. Rocky looked back helplessly at Rydel, then disappeared into Ross's room, leaving Rydel and Riker alone.

It was silent for a while. Riker refused to look directly at Rydel, and she knew she had to say something.

"I made breakfast," she informed him.

"Cool."

"Want some?"

"Nah, I already ate," he answered.

"Really?" Rydel continued, raising her eyebrows. "What did you have?"

Now he looked at her, narrowing his eyes. "Cereal. Why?" His heart pounded. Rocky had told her.

"Please eat, Riker," she pleaded.

He was going to deny it again, but the look on her face stopped him. She was crushed, he knew. Riker realized that Ross wasn't the only one who would be ruined by his actions. It would kill his whole family.

And he made a decision right there, to do this for them.

"Rydel, will you help me find a therapist?"


End file.
